Flignitz Board Expresses Unity with Transgender Bathrooms

In response to current issues of restroom access for persons of transgendered identity, the Board of Directors of Flignitz Corporation unanimously approved the following statement:

“As a multi-national enterprise, with offices and facilities operating in many geographic locales throughout the world, Flignitz Corporation fully embraces its incumbent social responsibility, and a duly certified quorum of the Board of Directors hereby reconfirms its deepest commitment to proactive gender-neutral policies and procedures, and reasonable accommodation, as guided by our core principles of inclusiveness, mutual respect, and universal human dignity, within an agile yet unwavering collaboration of free expressionism, while continuously pursuing the objectives of our empowerment of genuine community involvement, to strive only to serve the best interests of all our customers, clients, partners, and employees.”

The statement was released on May 1, 2016, shortly after the special Board meeting adjourned in Colmar-Ribeauvillé, France.

Lisa Podsoglyet, Senior Human Resources Policy Advisor (who is, coincidentally, a self-identified sentient entity of indeterminate gender-related classification), said at a press conference, “This statement represents the official position of Flignitz Corporation, in a crystal clear and unambiguous tone. It was taken only after many thoughtful deliberations among Board members, months of painstaking due diligence carried out by senior Board staff, and lengthy consultations with expert legal counsel, who have precise and detailed knowledge of the various laws and customs related to human excretion in many of our international operating locales.”

Podsoglyet went on to explain, “The Board of Directors appointed a dedicated Restroom Policy Advisory task force, to promote open and honest dialog with individuals representing each of the 37 distinct gender-identity demographics, as revealed voluntarily by our employees around the world. The task force also conducted brainstorming sessions and presented draft proposals to focus groups of concerned stakeholders.”